For once the words are not there.... as I search my thoughts for something, anything to write about nothing comes.
My walk with Him is quiet today. No soft words spoken from His mouth.
Maybe I'm not listening.... maybe I'm being to loud to hear His words.
Or maybe... just maybe today He is quiet.
There are hours... days... sometimes weeks that go by without that closeness, with that feeling that I am alone and that He is far away.
But I know that those feelings are deceiving.
He NEVER goes... He is NEVER far away.
He is here. He is close by. He is right here next to me... inside of me.
Never leaving, never changing, always listening, always here... always loving.
A good talk with close friends leads to conversations about finding Him.... about how we hear His voice.
And I remember reading this post from a favorite place and reading her words cause me to pause and really think.
"Maybe it's this: God hides with the poor and in the pain and we can only witness Him at His most beautifully creative work in the places needing redemption. Maybe we are only at our most beautiful work in the same places too --- the places where we don't hide behind the distractions of stuff, where we finally empty our hands of all our possessions and idols and come to God empty and ready. The places where we can make art with tears."Maybe the reason why all is so quiet is because there are things in hiding... hidden even from myself. Maybe I don't want to find those things. Maybe I'm content being full of my possessions and idols. Maybe my heart is harder then I think it is.
This I know for sure: God does His very best work in me when I am completely empty of myself.
So I will not be content with silence today. Instead I will search... and pray for that emptiness. For the hidden to be made known. For all barriers that stand between me and His voice to be torn down.